N'Levels draw to a close. 1 more month before the Language papers start while another 2 more before the other subjects. It does seem really near all of a sudden. The days pass so fast. It felt like it was still the start of the year for me, slacking all day, not doing a thing related to studies.

I'm just coming to think about this really hard, i should be mugging, studying everyday instead of playing. My parents always tell me this," What are you going to do if your fail your N'Levels?". The moment they say this, i could not find a phrase or even a word to reply them. Perhaps i have to go to a private school like my sister or even worst ITE, but no i will not disappoint a second time and there will be no more mistakes made. I know i can never make it to Junior Collage so i turn my attention to the Polytechnic's.

What do i want to do in life? There are many options and i can't even seem to think of something which i suppose is interesting to wake up every morning to. Even if i do pass my N'Levels, will i be able to cope with the O'Level standard the following year? Like what my English teacher Miss Rev said," If you do pass your O'Levels with 10 points, i will guarantee that it will be a very tough year ahead of you, but for those of you who pass with 9 marks and below should be able to pass their O'Levels". The way she said it is really demoralizing for everyone in my class.

This was a conversation between Me and Benjamin Tan.

Me: Hey, Dota tonight?

Ben: See first.

Me: Why not?

Ben: I think you should stop playing for just this 2 months, last time i used to play every night and end up sleeping in class the following morning. Just stop playing for these 2 months only, study only.

Me: ( Silent )

I just sat there speechless, i could not imagine Benjamin Tan, the Snake King would say something so wise. Normally he would say stupid things so this was a first for him.

Play time is over.

5am, the alarm rang. Walked towards the toilet to have a cold shower. Changed and got ready by 7. Went to pick up Enshao from his house and went straight to Bukit Timah. Both of us felt nervous as we don't know who we are up against. Reached the starting point, we met the rest of the gang, William, Joshua, Ellery, Calvin, etc just to name a few. It was really crowded as by the time i reached, many competitors are arriving in the dozens. It is the 2nd cross-country race of the year.



I was in the Boys Division B'. Up against both my friends William and Joshua. It was a tensed moment. I knew if i were to rush immediately, i will not have enough stamina to keep my pace. My best timing of 2 rounds around the Bukit Timah Nature Reserve was around 55Min's. Its going to be hell for me, pedalling non-stop for almost 1hour. This is the route that i will be cyclist through for 2 rounds.



Crazy shit i tell you. I started around 0845. the horn sounded and off we go. At first i rushed forward towards the centre of the group, it was during the climb which i overtook a few people and was in a steady position after. After i reached 3rd place, there was this climb which cause me to lose my position. As i was climbing, i quickly shifted to my easiest gear, as i continue to pedal, there was a loud cranking sounds coming from my RD. I did not really care as i just want to stay in 3rd position. Without any notice, my chain just skipped causing me to stop and allow the riders behind me to overtake. I was cursing every moment because the riders behind me could not climb as therefore was running up. I said to myself," Just forget it and overtake him later". True enough i overtook the guy and regain 3rd position.

Just as another steep uphill climb was in front, i quickly shifted my gear and again it skipped causing me to allow 2 other guys to overtake me. I cursed and cursed. Its like why? Wtf man. I was 5Th position throughout the race. In the end i just got 5Th place. That won me a trophy and some $120. I suspected that the guy giving free servicing at the start point screwed my tuning, but only to find out that my RD Hanger is dented. gay shit man.


Ain't it nice?


I swear i could have won the guy beside me in white.








The line up.


The Bikes.





Well have to thank Williams dad for taking the time off to come down and take pictures.

Anyways, after my race, about 1-2hours later, it was the start of the Men's Open. Majority of the people who registered for the Men's Open was the Singapore National riders like Samuel Yang and Junaidi. Even Calvin joined the Men's Open category. For the Men's open, it was 5 rounds instead of 2 rounds, now that is sick. Their average timing for 1 round is around 15-20Min's, that's very fast. In first place for the Men's Open was Junaidi, followed by Samuel. Calvin got 4Th place, congrats to him. I think he is the youngest in the Men's Open at just the age of 17.


The national riders.

Well, just after every race is over, its time for the lucky draw. okay to cut it short, my friend won the top prize which is worth 1.1k. I just feel like killing him for no apparent reason.

Okay time to sleep. School reopens tomorrow. Back aches like hell. Good night.

Yesterday was both a sad and fun day for me. That fateful day my aunt had passed away, just barely a few days after i visited her in hospital. Its was very sudden and shocking. I remembered it was just midnight when my mom came to my room to inform me about the news. It was quite shocking because the last time i visited her, she was on a road to recovery. Yesterday was the day we went to cremate her body.

Cut it short, the crematory centre at Mandai was really modern. I was expecting a run down place which was not renovated in a few years. I did not know we would be allowed to view the coffin being placed inside the oven or what ever it's called. As the coffin is placed on a mechanical carrier which automatically moved to the oven. As it was slowly reaching its destination, i could hear cries coming from my cousin's and other few relatives, i knew deeply inside i was very sad for this tragic happening and almost felt tears coming out. What has happened has happened, nothing we can do about it but to move on.

After that went home to change and live up to my promise because when i made a bet with Faris that if he won me in this Custom game in Warcraft, i would cut off my fringe. At first i won him 3 games straight, i taunted him even further and i lost the 4th game. Somehow he was quite lucky to win. No choice so i just went to cut.

Went to sukardi's birthday with Faris, Danial and his brother, cabbed there and yeah, first thing we did there was to gamble again. Made only $5, thats very pathetic, at least it can buy me a Mc'Donald's meal or burger. Had to feel sorry for desmond, he lost alot since he was the banker.
Cut to the chase, the best part of the birthday party was when Susu kissed yelin. That was the moment, after 19 years of waiting. Should have recorded it down.

After that went to irc. Wanted to play Dota but was waiting for more people so i left first. Was feeling tired. Thats all.

Bye.

You know when we enjoy or have fun, we tend to forget our problems. We start to forget about pain, sufferings, war, disaster's and death. We will always think it will be just right for us, but do you know that anything can just happen in a blink of an eye? Would i be able to cope?

Sometimes we enjoy ourselfs by going out, buying clothes or whatever stuff we feel like buying, playing soccer, dota, pool, etc etc etc.

Few days back i received news that my aunt was hospitalized in Tan Tock Seng Hospital and is in coma due to a bad fall. (How she fell or what happen is still unknown) I just stood standing, shocked and in a world of my own thinking how could this happen.

Just today, again i received news that my aunt has woken up. My mom decided to visit her, so i tagged along. We had to go all the way to the ICU ward to find my aunt. I tell you, the minute i stepped through the entrance to the ICU wards, i felt very nervous. I don't know what to say to my aunt. Worst of all, when i walked past the first ward and saw the patient inside, i knew that person was in pain with all the needles inserted into the body. At that moment i felt very uneasy, i just kept thinking if that were to happen to me, what would i ever do. I could not bear to look at the rest of the wards as i knew i would have this weird feeling inside me, something i can't explain.

Upon reaching my aunts ward, she already had visitors. I guess all of them were from her husbands side as i did not know anyone at all. I walked in with my mom and i saw my aunt for the first time in ages. I could not bare to look at here for too long as i too could feel her pain and suffering. She could not speak due to something inserted into her mouth and it really made me sad looking at my aunt.

I started to question myself, asking is there really such thing as god? If there was a god, why would he make us suffer. I thought god loved his creations. All kinds of thoughts passed through my mind. Suddenly my aunt pointed to me and my mom to come into the room and talk to her. It was a long talk, my mom was trying to comfort her. I could just feel my aunt's agony. Since she could not speak, she had to write down her thoughts and feelings or whatever she wants to say to us. After a certain time spent inside, we decided to leave as we wanted my aunt to rest.

My mom kept telling me, anything can happen in a blink of an eye. Sometimes life is just cruel, but what choice do i have? If only no such thing as death in this world. No such thing as pain or suffering.

Good night, I'm off to bed.

X-RATED RIDDLES

Q What is the difference between a drug dealer and a hooker?
A. A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again.

Q. What's a mixed feeling?
A. When you see your mother-in-law backing off a cliff in your new car.

Q. What's the height of conceit?
A. Having an orgasm and calling out your own name.

Q. What's the definition of macho?
A. Jogging home from your vasectomy.

Q. What's the difference between a G-Spot and a golf ball?
A. A guy will actually search for a golf ball

Q. Do you know how New Zealanders practice safe sex?
A. They spray paint X's on the back of the sheep that kick!

Q.Why is divorce so expensive?
A. Because it's worth it!

Q. What is a Yankee?
A. The same as a quickie, but a guy can do it alone.

Q. What do Tupperware and a walrus have in common?
A. They both like a tight seal.

Q. What do a Christmas tree and priest have in common?
A. Their balls are just for decoration.

Q.What is the difference between "ooooooh"and "aaaaaaah"?
A. About three inches.

Q. Why do Gay men wear ribbed condoms?
A. For traction in the mud.

Q: What's the difference between purple and pink?
A. The grip.

Q. How do you find a blind man in a nudist colony?
A. It's not hard.

Q: How do you circumcise a hillbilly?
A: Kick his sister in the jaw.

Q: What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife?
A: 45 pounds.

Q: What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband?
A: 45 minutes.

Q: Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
A: Breasts don't have eyes.

Q: If the dove is the bird of peace, what is the bird of true love?
A. The swallow.

Q: What is the difference between medium and rare?
A: Six inches is medium, eight inches is rare.

Q. Why do women rub their eyes when they get up in the morning?
A . They don't have balls to scratch!

Finally, its the holidays. 1 month of studying, or fun? Failed my mid-year exams, totally screwed everything up. My mom found out about the results just this morning and soon she unleashed her "Scream of Pain", i thought only the QOP in Dota had this ability.
___________________________________________________________________
SCREAM OF PAIN


The Queen of Pain lets loose a piercing scream, damaging nearby enemies.

Level 1 - 85 damage per target.
Level 2 - 165 damage per target.
Level 3 - 225 damage per target.
Level 4 - 300 damage per target.

Cooldown: 10 seconds.

Level 1: 85 mana, 10 sec cooldown.
Level 2: 105 mana, 10 sec cooldown.
Level 3: 120 mana, 10 sec cooldown.
Level 4: 140 mana, 10 sec cooldown.
___________________________________________________________________

Totally spoiled my morning, i guess this june holiday is the time for me to catch up. No more fooling around. I must start studying at least 2 hours a day.( I have been saying this and not doing it, its time to put my words into actions. ) I can't fail anymore, i need to pass, pass, pass before my mom unleashes another ability, "Sonic Wave"
___________________________________________________________________
SONIC WAVE


Creates a gigantic wave of sound which deals heavy damage to all units in a line.
Level 1 - 290 damage.
Level 2 - 430 damage.
Level 3 - 600 damage.

Cooldown: 120/100/75 seconds.

Level 1: 250 mana, 120 sec cooldown.
Level 2: 360 mana, 100 sec cooldown.
Level 3: 500 mana, 75 sec cooldown.
___________________________________________________________________

I guess after she unleashes the 2 ability, i would be dead. I just can't seem to study. Its like i always get distracted by something like the computer and i can never study straight for 2 hours. At this rate i'm going to fail my N's. Well starting next monday, i shall start studying for at least 2 hours.

Today, Friday 04 May. 8.30am, Maths paper in the morning, 1h 30mins. Did not have enough time to complete the whole paper although i knew how to do. 10.30am, Social Studies paper, 1h 30mins. Could not answer much of section B.

Can my day get any worst?

Had to quarrel with people. It did not just stop here.

Went to meet Enshao at Bukit Timah around 4pm. Upon reaching the trail, both of us found out that we needed to oil our chains as it was dry and making alot of noise. Nevermind that, went to Rodalink and changed. Soon after that, went into the trail to only find out it was super muddy. As we past the railway track area, was climbing up a pile a rocks and when i climbed over it, i found out that my chain had dented. Took me almost 15mins to fix the chain. Seriously, can my day get any worst?

Continued the trail, everything went smooth for awhile until i was climbing again. As i was reaching the top, the chain just broke. Had to push all the way out back to Rodalink. Enshao was laughing. I was swearing every moment. Went to the Rodalink and fixed the chain which cost me $35. Soon after that we turned into Toh Tuck and was climbing up again, GUESS WHAT!!?!?!?! Ehshaos chain broke. Retribution for laughing at me earlier on. Went back again to fix the chain onto his bike and ended my ride.

Hopefully tomorrow would be a better day. Got to study, study, study.